Back to the in Between(1)
Sean here: Back in the middle and ready to be in the in between. Whether we are meeting someone for the first time, the hundredth time or on our 50th anniversary. Meeting someone in a mutual space and with common interests is always an opportunity and a challenge.
On the one hand the opportunity is to build and establish more trust and greater respect and closer intimacy. On the other hand, the challenge can be to avoid conflict, unhelpful habits or repeating negative patterns.
For too long in this society, we have celebrated unrestrained individualism over common community.Joe Biden
Our direct communication and active listening skills can help us to establish and/or support trust, respect intimacy and even love. Additionally, our mindset and intentions can assist us in our expression of our common and shared togetherness.
Mindset and intentions are significant:
- You are the most important.
- I need…
- Do you like me?
- Are you right?
- Do I want to be right?
- No matter what.
- Do you want me?
- I know what I want.
- Is being right more important?
- I am unsure.
- How invested am I in winning?
- Who am I If…?
- Am I ok with being wrong and/or apologizing?
- Can I be loved and not know the answer?
- We are equal and stable together.
- And on and on.
How we feel and think about ourselves and the ones we are with comes across. This is true whether we want it to or not. It is noticeable, recognizable and real. If something is not quite right with you or not quite with the ones we are with; we and they can tune in to the “vibe” if we want to.
Our intention and “vibe” can be focused on mutual, common and shared truth and existence. This allows us to be truly together in a space in between our needs, desires, doubts and insecurities. In other words, we can create a space just for us (me and you, you and me, I and the other). In this space we can be ourselves and find each other.
Creating and maintaining this space can take a moment, a while or a lifetime.
This depends on the willingness and ability of ourselves and our others to let ourselves just be who we are, when we are, and where we are.
When, where and how we meet in the middle next time.
This is Sean. Try just being with yourself (and those around you) for a minute, an hour, a day, a week, and see what happens.
Love to hear your thoughts. Till next time! Our earlier Blog-Lessons: